Funny Text Messages

Funny Texts For Your Friends

Posted in Funny Text Messages on December 11th, 2011 by admin – Comments Off

Always think before you speak or act,

If you are in a situation and confused,

And your brain is unable to decide,

Then take a deep breath and ask

yourself if you really have brain.


Boy to a girl: why all the girls are so pretty?

Girl: it is because God has created us with His hands.

Boy: so you think boys are downloaded internet files?


There are six birds sitting on a branch of a tree.

A man appears with a gun in his hands.

He aims and shoots towards birds.

Five birds fly away but there is one bird still sitting there.





He is just being arrogant.


Amazing Collection Of Funny Text Messages From Lovely Text.

Make Fun in Elevator

Posted in Funny Text Messages on January 4th, 2011 by boombird – Comments Off

- Make race car noises when people get on and off.

- Grimace painfully while slapping your forehead and muttering, “Shut up dammit, all of you just SHUT UP!”

- Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.

- Whistle the first 7 notes of “It’s a Small World” incessantly.

- Sell Girl Scout Cookies.

- On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.

- Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask, “Got enough air in there?”

- Shave.

- Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear your upside-down.

- Lean over to another passenger and whisper, “Ever had a Wet Willy?”

- Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

- When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to pull the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.

- Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you “Admiral.”

- One word: Flatulence!

- Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: “I’ve got new socks on.”

- On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go “plink” at the bottom.

- Do Tai Chi exercises.

- When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back, “Oh, not now, damn motion sickness!”

- Give religious tracts to each passenger.

- Meow occasionally.

- Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.

- Frown and mutter, “Gotta go, gotta go,” then sigh and say, “oops!”

- Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.

- Sing “Mary Had a Little Lamb” while continuously pushing buttons.

- Holler, “Chutes away!!” whenever the elevator descends.

- Walk on with a cooler that says “Human Head” on the side.

- Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce, “You’re one of THEM!” and move to the far corner of the elevator.

- Burp, then say, “Mmmmm…..tasty!”

- Leave a box between the doors.

- Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for them.

- Wear a hand puppet and talk to the other passengers “through” it.

- Start a sing-along.

- When the elevator is silent, look around and ask, “Is that your beeper?”

- Play the accordion.

- Shadow box.

- Say, “Ding!” at each floor.

- Lean against the button panel.

- Say, “I wonder what all these do?” and then push ALL the red buttons.

- Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.

- Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your “personal space.”

- Bring a chair along.

- Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger, “Wanna see wha in muh mouf??”

- Blow spit bubbles.

- Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.

- Announce in a demonic voice, “I must find a more suitable host body.”

- Carry a blanket a clutch it protectively.

- Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

- Wear “X-Ray Specs” and leer suggestively at other passengers.

- Stare at your thumb and say, “I think it’s getting bigger.”

- If anyone brushes against you, recoil fiercely and scream, “BAD TOUCH